Sunday, January 07, 2007

GET ME OUT!!!

At work today, I was having a chat with my colleague and we talked about us getting old. I felt odd when he mentioned that he is approaching 27 and I am going to be 26 this year. Am I really that old? I have watched enough TV programmes and sports shows to tell how a 26 should be like. It could be a stereotype but it seems like I am a far way off the mark of a 26!

Maybe it is during the few depersonalization moments when I am able to "come out" of myself and see myself as myself. Duhz... what am I saying! LOL. The thing is... I cannot comprehend the fact that the body and the age (number) is running so far ahead of myself!

They are indeed not reflecting the real me and I think this is so unfair! Haha. My knees cannot allow me to run the distance I want. They are not even allowing me to engage my favourtie sports, soccer, with vigor and tenacity! Now, whenever I play soccer, I have babysit my knees, making sure that they are well taken care of. I have to watch out for stones or any pot-holes! How irritating!

Another thing is that the number thingy is getting on my nerves! I really don't feel like I am 26! I am definitely no where near that! It could be because I am trying to relive certain parts of the my life where I feel I was deprived! LOL It always feel weird to tell someone that I am 26. I do admit that due to the not-anywhere-near-perfect complexion and the constant exposure to the sun, I may not look 26 but I certainly do not act like one.

I am still a mummy's boy. Not in the literal sense! LOL. It just seems that a mummy's boy is someone who has not grown up and is still stuck in his adolescent years. I feel like I am still in Polytechnic. I feel like I am still studying full time, carefree and having not that much of a worry for the latter years! LOL I mean I do consider about my future but I am just not feeling pressures in life yet. Maybe I am still living in a comfort zone, where the need to expand myself consciously is lacking.

So please... help me out of this body! LOL I am only 21. Why am I in a 26 years old body! Time is flying past me and now I am lost. Not knowing where to go, what to skip to get to the 26 years old stage. I must now learn to love my body as it is, accepting the fact that my body and age is not the true reflection of myself. Therefore, never let age factor dictates how you live your life man. I certainly don't. LOL Maybe I need a broken leg or the fact that I am unable to walk to stop me from enjoying what I enjoy most. Maybe I need a rude awakening to show me that I am indeed 26, no longer 21! But I guess it will get pretty ugly.

Bottomline, have reality sink into you but never let it sink your dreams, your love or yourself! I AM YOUNG AT HEART is what they always says! Indeed!

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